Rescue me. My white trash great uncle just pulled out his belly at the restaurant to show us how big this woman's tit was
Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
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