Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
Dude, she's so old there's a chalk outline where her reproductive organs used to be.
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
My STD test came back clean. I'd like to thank all the guys I've slept with, they made this possible. I want to say thanks to all my friends, for believing in me living up to the full slut potential. And last but not least, I'd like to thank alcohol. I wouldn't be who I am today w/out you. I feel like I need to frame this...
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
You can't just hum the Jaws theme song when you pull down my pants.
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
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