jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
Practice the "sorry I may have given you herpes" conversation with me before I call him and break the news
My landlord wasn't pleased about the new fire pit we built him.
how do i say, "my ex is going to be at this party so don't look like shit" without sounding like a bitch?
Dude, I couldn't come. She sounded like a goddamn dying walrus.
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
I might be the strongest willed bouncer ever. Earlier tonight a girl flashed me trying to get in. I just replied "Sorry I'm gay", she believed me and left.
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
Randomize
