Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
Randomize