May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
Randomize
