So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
He's the equivalent of a body pillow and a dildo. But still funny. We have good pillow talk.
Why the fuck is the royal wedding at 4am. That is obviously not the most appropriate time to drink during finals. It's like I'm bound to fail, by royal decree.
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
Randomize
