What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
May the power of my ass compel you!!
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
The neighborhood cougar just purred at me while I was doing yard work. I’m terrified and tumescent
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