i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
It was one time. Now I have to constantly remind her my name is Jessica not Jizzica.
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
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