Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
I promise not to pretend to be Jesus and take the wheel. But to my credit you shouldn't be saying that while I'm that drunk and we are in a car.
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
I turned on Elf, made myself a mojito, and am eating one of a sleeve of Ritz. You tell me if I wanna go out tonight.
Randomize
