I was just at the urinal, started to go, then farted, then said oh yea out loud, then heard someone move in the stall behind me
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
Wanna tell me why vodka seeped out of the memory foam when I climbed into my bed?
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
You called me last night and said you had a vision that a cat made you a sandwich. You were tripping way too hard
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
Randomize
