i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
Just found out that I was singing john legend songs as I threw up last night. Quality.
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
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