hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
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