Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
The maid moved your bed and found almost 40 used condoms and wrappers. She just looks at me and says "Dave?"
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
Randomize
