it wasn't lemon gatorade
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature
Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
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