Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
I'm watching Terminator eating a jar of marshmallow fluff. Trust me, you are not fat.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
Randomize
