I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
Tried to land my foot on his shoulder and kicked him in the face. Then I fell into a homeless man's bike and posed with a buffalo head. How was your night?
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
I just had sex with a man wearing a Darth Vader helmet....he pressed the voice button the whole time that said "I am your father". I don't think I can ever come back from this
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
Randomize
