Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
My cat is staring at me while I drink my wine on the bathroom floor in the morning instead of attending class. Sorry mom and dad. Sorry cat.
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
Randomize
