I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
I need you to perform a face transplant. Please remove your face from your accounting book and relocate it to where it's most needed - between my legs.
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
Randomize
