i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
You know you're in the hamptons when it's 10pm And you kind of want to vomit white wine on rug that costs more than your apartment.
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
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