whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
i'm almost one hundred percent positive that i have a warrant out for my arrest in this city. i also don't give a fuck because im drinking TEQUILAAAA
my brain is sober enough to have a conversation.. but my arms feel nice
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
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