all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
I broke my wrist trying to give him a blow job...
And this is why we can’t have nice things
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
So there we are, fucking beneath the Christmas tree and I glance up and see one of the local Jehovah's witnesses staring in horror through the decorative glass in the front door. I'm so proud of us.
Randomize
