You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
i just ate two sandwiches and am debating booty calling my landlord
I just saw a guy getting escorted with handcuffs on, I'm too drunk to be at the airport right now.
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
Since you're going to wake up and see one bajillion missed calls from me, I just want you to know that's a perfectly reasonable number. Now come downystairs.
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
Randomize