she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
I feel compelled to tell you that I woke up this morning and found an entire corn on the cob in my purse. Ive decided not to question my drunken behavior anymore, and to just accept it as my lifestyle.
Just invented taco cereal.
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
Randomize