just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
dude i woke up to her making a statue of my morning wood for her sculpture class. HOW THE FUCK do you think i feel about her?
Was just shown the photos from a professional photoshoot my aunt had for their dog...not drunk enough for this...
New years is officially the only time its okay to drunk dial your parents.
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
You bought champagne and told everyone it was because I'd just found out I was pregnant. How exactly is that being a good wingman?
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
this whole "benign brain tumor" is truly a blessing in disguise. I almost want to start bringing MRIs to the bar because sympathy pussy is flowing like the nile
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
Randomize
