The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
You were so drunk that you were trying to take pictures of a MILF at the park so you could send them to Adam, but you didn't want to "seem creepy," so you used taking pictures of her son as a cover. Needless to say, cops were called.
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
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