garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
I'm eating tomato paste and drinking banana juice that is expired. Can we please get groceries tonight?
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
I just want to find somebody intelligent enough to trick my parents into thinking she's not a trophy wife. Is that too much to ask?
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