She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
I got a job at a micro-brewery. Now who made the bigger mistake, them or me?
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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