had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
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