Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
as soon as I walked into work this morning, my boss called me out on my hangover, patted me on the back and said I'm getting time an a half for even showing up. Did I really look that bad this morning?
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
Randomize
