If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
Randomize
