I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
The waitress at the airport bar just asked me if I wanted a "to go" beer, hahahahaha OF COURSE I WANT A TO GO BEER.
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
Last night was a sign that I need to stop sleeping with any girl that can quote the mighty ducks
Specially the ones that look like Goldberg
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
Randomize
