so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
We fucked for 9 months, but he didn't want anything serious. So, I got rid of him and went on a date with a guy last night that looks like Kylo Ren. Who's really winning here?
You need to stop showing people the things i drunk-text to you... i have a reputation to uphold here
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize