just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
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