You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
it was only during my walk of shame that i realized i was wearing the exact same outfit that julia roberts wears on the dvd cover or pretty woman. prostitution is my destiny.
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
Do you have feelings for this penis?
Randomize
