I heard we made out
I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
imagine playing with puppies while we're drunk.
Like... we could film it and put like, "do you believe in magic" as the backround song and it would be complete joy.
Just got to costco. Where are you?
Liquor aisle, bring another cart.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
FYI you are now my emergency contact at plan parenthood
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
'allo, good sire. how dost thy day goeth?
oh no. you're at that weird Renaissance Festival thing again, aren't you?
I am an inebriated elf. you may fucketh off.
Randomize
