Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
This drunk lesbian I just met keeps trying to shove sushi in my mouth. Help.
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Randomize
