While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
his prince albert piercing just severely cut the roof of my mouth. can you pick me up at the hospital if he drops me off?
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
normally i would apologize for my drunk texting but even sober me agrees.
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
Randomize
