Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
I just came up with the perfect plan. Once i'm a dentist i'm going to offer dad a million dollars to divorce mom.
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
All I do lately is eat steak, drink warm beer, watch porn, and avoid booty calls when I'm too lazy to take a shower. I think the apocalypse turned me into a dude.
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
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