As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
I'd just like to say before I start drinking tonight that not only do I not find you attractive; I don't want to hook up with you, suck your dick, be your "suga mama" or have your babies. Please disregard any texts, phone calls or voicemails that say otherwise..
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
Randomize
