Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
Randomize