girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
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