Never drink rum straight from the bottle, even if people say it'll make you a pirate. It won't: it'll make you a bumbling shitfaced idiot who just drank rum straight from the bottle.
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
We're not piercing ourselves today.
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
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