It took me 40.8 seconds to take a dump at her house, I know because I timed myself.
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
then he tried to convert me to islam
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
Ok well my life just seems more exciting by default because I'm dating my married boss and sexting with my ex
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
Randomize
