The bar is so dead the tender gave us free shots for staying. They mixed 2pac and phil collins. That's worth at least three shots.
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
Okay the common myth about putting tampons in you nostrils for a nose bleed is busted. It just starts coming out through your throat.
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
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