Sponge bath it is.
I think we should go ahead and pin a note to my shirt when we go out that says"do NOT buy me shots"
On the back we can put possible side effects may include: indiscriminate making out, brief crying spells, yelling in jibberish, and sudden sleep.
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
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