she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
Drunkenly found an error on my bar tab last night. THANK YOU ACCOUNTING.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
Randomize
