is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
I just sugar scrubbed my vagina. If I don't get laid tonight, me and the universe are gonna have some problems.
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
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