Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
Randomize