Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
I havent jerked off in so long, my dick literally prevented me from rolling over in my sleep this morning. new definition of painful?
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
My New Years Resolution is to come up with a new resolution monthly. January: decrease my shotgunning consumption speed to 7 seconds or less.
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
Who put my cat in the fridge?
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
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