I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
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