Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
I filled two of the glass ornaments in my mom's bathroom last night with vodka. That way no one sees me drinking on Christmas. Alcoholic or genius? All I know it makes bathroom trips frequent and enjoyable.
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
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