I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
I just found a list in your handwriting titled "Places I've Peed." The National Mall and 'under the second bridge after the bend in the road' are two of the tamer entries. I tip my hat.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
My bathroom smells like artichokes and absinthe. I am naming a perfume after you and using the money to buy new towels.
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
I woke up this morning with a text from my mom as to why the hell random people were showing up at the house. Turns out nobody came to our house party because I gave them my old address, fuck pre-partying for real
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
