Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
You picked the wrong day to call in sick. She's wearing the librarian glasses today.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
You know how most people would take your keys when they don't want you to leave a party? Those 2 girls aren't most people. They took my pants instead.
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
Just rolled up to a matinee showing of THE HOBBIT. At the dollar theater. Alone. In sweats. With a fifth of sunnybrook and leftover pizza in a ziplock. There's a dude here in cape with his elderly mother. I'm handling this breakup FIIIIIINE.
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
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